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Guide 2 Parenting   >   Books   >   Humor

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Humor Books


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Sh*t My Dad Says

By Justin Halpern

It Books
Released: 2010-05-04
Hardcover (176 pages)

Sh*t My Dad Says
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  • ISBN13: 9780061992704
  • Notes: BUY WITH CONFIDENCE, Over one million books sold! 98% Positive feedback. Compare our books, prices and service to the competition. 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed
Product Description:

After being dumped by his longtime girlfriend, twenty-eight-year-old Justin Halpern found himself living at home with his seventy-three-year-old dad. Sam Halpern, who is "like Socrates, but angrier, and with worse hair," has never minced words, and when Justin moved back home, he began to record all the ridiculous things his dad said to him:

"That woman was sexy. . . . Out of your league? Son, let women figure out why they won't screw you. Don't do it for them."

"Do people your age know how to comb their hair? It looks like two squirrels crawled on their heads and started fucking."

"The worst thing you can be is a liar. . . . Okay, fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but then number two is liar. Nazi one, liar two."

More than a million people now follow Mr. Halpern's philosophical musings on Twitter, and in this book, his son weaves a brilliantly funny, touching coming-of-age memoir around the best of his quotes. An all-American story that unfolds on the Little League field, in Denny's, during excruciating family road trips, and, most frequently, in the Halperns' kitchen over bowls of Grape-Nuts, Sh*t My Dad Says is a chaotic, hilarious, true portrait of a father-son relationship from a major new comic voice.



My Man Jeeves (1919)

By P. G. Wodehouse

Kindle Edition

My Man Jeeves (1919)
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Product Description:
My Man Jeeves, first published in 1919, introduced the world to affable, indolent Bertie Wooster and his precise, capable valet, Jeeves. Some of the finest examples of humorous writing found in English literature are woven around the relationship between these two men of very different classes and temperaments. Where Bertie is impetuous and feeble, Jeeves is cool-headed and poised. This collection, the first book of Jeeves and Wooster stories, includes "Absent Treatment," "Helping Freddie," "Rallying Round Old George," "Doing Clarence a Bit of Good," "Fixing It for Freddie," and "Bertie Changes His Mind."

BELLY LAUGHS: The Naked Truth About Pregnancy and Childbirth

By Jenny McCarthy

Da Capo Press
Hardcover (208 pages)

BELLY LAUGHS: The Naked Truth About Pregnancy and Childbirth
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Product Description:
Brimming with the author's signature frankness and humor, a no-holds-barred account of what you can really expect when you're expecting.

Oh, the joys of pregnancy! There's the gasiness, constipation, queasiness, and exhaustion; the forgetfulness, crankiness, and the constant worry. Of course, no woman is spared these discomforts and humiliations, but most are too polite to complain or too embarrassed to talk about them. Not Jenny McCarthy!

In Belly Laughs, the actress and new mother reveals the naked truth about the tremendous mood swings, the excruciating pains, and the unseemly disfigurement that go along with pregnancy. Never shy, frequently crude, and always laugh-out-loud funny, McCarthy covers it all in the grittiest of girlfriend detail. With tips and hilarious musings on morning sickness and hormonal rage, hemorrhoids, pregnant sex, and the torture and sweet relief that is delivery, Belly Laughs is must-read comic relief for anyone who is pregnant, who has ever been pregnant, is trying to get pregnant or indeed, has ever been born!

Awkward Family Photos

By Mike Bender

Three Rivers Press
Released: 2010-05-04
Paperback (192 pages)

Awkward Family Photos
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  • ISBN13: 9780307592293
  • Notes: BUY WITH CONFIDENCE, Over one million books sold! 98% Positive feedback. Compare our books, prices and service to the competition. 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed
Product Description:
Based on the hit website, AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com (“painful, regrettable, horrifyingly awesome snaps of family bonding, you will laugh so hard that people in adjoining offices will ask what’s wrong with you”—Esquire), this full color book features never-before-seen photos and hilarious personal stories covering everything from uncomfortable moments with relatives, teen angst, sibling rivalry, and family vacations from hell. Cringe at the forced poses, bad hair, and matching outfits--all prompting us to look at our own families and celebrate the fact that we're not alone. Nothing says awkward better than an uncomfortable family photograph!

The Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy

By Vicki Iovine

Pocket
Paperback (288 pages)

The Girlfriends  Guide to Pregnancy
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Product Description:

Your doctor gives you medical advice.
Your mother buys you baby clothes.
But who can give you the real skinny when you're pregnant?

Your girlfriends, of course -- at least, the ones who've been through the exhilaration and exhaustion, the agony and ecstasy of pregnancy. Four-time delivery room veteran Vicki lovine talks to you the way that only a best friend can-in the book that will go the whole nine months for every mother-to-be. Here is straight talk about those little things that are too strange or embarrassing to ask anyone about, practical tips and hilarious takes on everything pregnant. From learning you're expecting ("Oh my god, how do I get out of this?") to the day your newborn arrives ("You mean I have to take the baby home with me?"), she gives you the lowdown on:

  • WHAT REALLY HAPPENS TO YOUR BODY -- from morning sickness to eating everything in sight, what to expect when going from being a babe to having one.
  • COMMON FEARS AND PARANOIA -- from turning into your mother to leaving the baby on the car roof, rest assured your anxieties are perfectly normal.
  • THE MANY MOODS OF PREGNANCY -- or why you're so irritable/distracted/tired/lightheaded (or at least, more than usual).
  • THE PREGNANCY YENTAS -- from your mom to his mom, they think they know everything -- and they don't hesitate to tell you what you're doing wrong. Girlfriend, take heart: if it's working for you, then you're doing just fine.
  • HOW TO HAVE SEX DURING PREGNANCY, SHOULD YOU SO DESIRE -- bearing in mind you'll have no interest afterward.
  • LOOKING AND FEELING YOUR BEST -- cautionary style tips from your best friend, who really would tell you if your perky newmom haircut makes you look like a pinheaded whale.

    When you need a reassuring voice or just a few good belly laughs, turn to The Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy.

  • Be Prepared: A Practical Handbook for New Dads

    By Gary Greenberg

    Simon & Schuster
    Paperback (240 pages)

    Be Prepared: A Practical Handbook for New Dads
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    Product Description:
    An indispensable survival manual for guys entering the trenches of fatherhood, Be Prepared is loaded with one-of-a-kind insights, MacGyver-esque tips and tricks, and no-nonsense advice for mastering the first year as a dad.

    Finally, a book that teaches men all the things they really need to know about fatherhood...including how to:

    • change a baby at a packed sports stadium

    • create a decoy drawer full of old wallets, remote controls, and cell phones to throw baby off the scent of your real gear

    • stay awake (or at least upright) at work

    • babyproof a hotel room in four minutes flat

    • construct an emergency diaper out of a towel, a sock, and duct tape

    Packed with helpful diagrams and detailed instructions, and delivered with a wry sense of humor, Be Prepared is the ultimate guide for sleep-deprived, applesauce-covered fathers everywhere.

    The Voyage Out

    By Virginia Woolf

    Douglas Editions
    Kindle Edition

    The Voyage Out
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    Product Description:
    Kindle edition of one of Woolf's wittiest social satires with active table of contents. The novel introduces Clarissa Dalloway, the central character of Woolf's later novel, Mrs. Dalloway.

    Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim

    By David Sedaris

    Back Bay Books
    Released: 2005-05-31
    Paperback (272 pages)

    Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim
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    • ISBN13: 9780316010795
    • Notes: BUY WITH CONFIDENCE, Over one million books sold! 98% Positive feedback. Compare our books, prices and service to the competition. 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed
    Product Description:
    In this phenomenal #1 bestseller, David Sedaris plays in the snow with his sisters. He goes on vacation with his family. He gets a job selling drinks. He attends his brother’s wedding. He mops his sister’s floor. He gives directions to a lost traveler. He eats a hamburger. He has his blood sugar tested. It all sounds so normal, doesn’t it?

    Yet Sedaris lifts the corner of ordinary life, revealing the absurdity teeming below the surface, exposing a world alive with hidden motives and obscure desires. In DRESS YOUR FAMILY IN CORDUROY AND DENIM, one of the wittiest and most original writers at work today gives us his richest book yet.

    Bad Mother: A Chronicle of Maternal Crimes, Minor Calamities, and Occasional Moments of Grace

    By Ayelet Waldman

    Anchor
    Released: 2010-05-04
    Paperback (224 pages)

    Bad Mother: A Chronicle of Maternal Crimes, Minor Calamities, and Occasional Moments of Grace
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    • ISBN13: 9780767930697
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    Product Description:
    In our mothers’ day there were good mothers, indifferent mothers, and occasionally, great mothers. Today we have only Bad Mothers: If you work, you’re neglectful; if you stay home, you’re smothering. If you discipline, you’re buying them a spot on the shrink’s couch; if you let them run wild, they will be into drugs by seventh grade. Is it any wonder so many women refer to themselves at one time or another as a “bad mother”?
     
    Writing with remarkable candor, and dispensing much hilarious and helpful advice along the way—Is breast best? What should you do when your daughter dresses up as a “ho” for Halloween?—Ayelet Waldman says it's time for women to get over it and get on with it in this wry, unflinchingly honest, and always insightful memoir on modern motherhood.

    What to Expect When Your Wife is Expanding: A Reassuring Month-by-Month Guide for the Father-to-Be, Whether He Wants Advice or Not

    By Thomas Hill

    Andrews McMeel Publishing
    Released: 1993-05-01
    Kindle Edition (160 pages)

    What to Expect When Your Wife is Expanding: A Reassuring Month-by-Month Guide for the Father-to-Be, Whether He Wants Advice or Not
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    Product Description:
    Complete with weird baby names, tips on how to avoid a sympathetic pregnancy, and a discourse on the evolution of ESPN and the role it plays postdelivery, Hill's tome has been thoroughly revised to account for not only the usual father-to-be questions but also the often baffling and amusing technological and medical advances awaiting today's four million expectant dads.

    This hilarious month-by-month guide offers new and veteran dads solace, laughter, and a bit of useful information, including a question-and-answer chapter covering basics like "How much does having a baby cost?"; visual charts assessing such things as the breakdown behind the mom-to-be's weight gain; sidebars covering common wife complaints and anticipated purchases; and much more.



     
           

     
     
       
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